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This was how the start of Chibi-Robo went for me.

Chibi-Robo can not talk, only hold up a sign for "yes" and "no," so I had to speak for him.

(Chibi-Robo and Telly emerge from a metal contraption into the living room. A birthday party with Jenny and her parents is in progress.)

Telly: We're here to make you happy.

Telly: I'm Telly. And this here is Chibi-Robo.

Father: Amazing!

Jenny: Ribbit!

Dog: Woof! Woof!

Telly: Oh! Hey, is this a birthday party?

Father: You got that right!

Telly: Uh-oh, Chibi-Robo! It looks like we've come to the party empty handed. We need to find a present for Jenny, and fast! Oh! How about that flower, Chibi-Robo?

Chibi-Robo: [ no ]

Telly: Really? Are you sure? I think it's perfect for Jenny...

Chibi-Robo: [ no ]

Telly: Really? Are you sure? I think it's perfect for Jenny...

Chibi-Robo: [ no ] (Can't we give her something else instead?)

Telly: Really? Are you sure? I think it's perfect for Jenny...

Chibi-Robo: [ no ] (The girl in the frog suit really doesn't want a rose.)

Telly: Really? Are you sure? I think it's perfect for Jenny...

Chibi-Robo: [ no ] (It's not appropriate for a 3 inch tall robot to give a rose to a girl for her eighth birthday.)

Telly: Really? Are you sure? I think it's perfect for Jenny...

Chibi-Robo: [ no ] (It's a rose. It has way too much sexual and emotional symbolism.)

Telly: Really? Are you sure? I think it's perfect for Jenny...

Chibi-Robo: [ no ] (She's eight - and wearing a frog suit - it can't possibly be perfect for her.)

Telly: Really? Are you sure? I think it's perfect for Jenny...

Chibi-Robo: [ no ] (Look, I fucking play video games so I don't have to do thing like give roses to girls. Or because I'm incapable of giving roses to girls. Both. Whatever. This isn't about my love life.)

Telly: Really? Are you sure? I think it's perfect for Jenny...

Chibi-Robo: [ no ] (Do you know the last time I gave a rose to a girl? It didn't go well.)

Telly: Really? Are you sure? I think it's perfect for Jenny...

Chibi-Robo: [ no ] (Giving her that rose will just make me feel guilty for not giving flowers to girls in real life more often. Or like, ever. Can't we please move on?)

Telly: Really? Are you sure? I think it's perfect for Jenny...

Chibi-Robo: [ no ] (I hate you.)

Telly: Really? Are you sure? I think it's perfect for Jenny...

Chibi-Robo: [ no ] (Seriously, I hate you.)

Telly: Really? Are you sure? I think it's perfect for Jenny...

Chibi-Robo: [ yes ] (I hate you so much.)

Telly: Well then, I'll leave the rest to you Chibi-Robo.

[ Chibi picks up the rose and walks over to Jenny. ]

Telly: Chibi-Robo - give the rose to Jenny!

Chibi-Robo: [ no ]

Telly: Huh? You're not going to give it to her?

Telly: Chibi-Robo - give the rose to Jenny!

Chibi-Robo: [ yes ] (Please understand this does not mean I'm trying to begin an amorous relationship with you.)

Jenny: [blushes] Ribbit ribbit ribbit!

Telly: You got 20 Happy Points!

— February 28, 2006

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