trenchant.org - daily

I decided to take my measly few hundred thousand dollars and head for Oahu.

Luckily, a couple hundred thousand dollars can get you:

• An Audi TT Sport (~$50k)
• A non-beach house (~$150k)

(Test Drive Unlimited apparently believes in using accurate car prices but is OK being off by orders of magnitude for housing.)

I raced against few people, made a bunch of money and bought a blue Corvette like I've always wanted.

And it was fun to drive it around along windy roads overlooking the beach and the ocean.

But it seemed like a pretty hollow existence. Between races and high speed chases with the cops I just went home to sit in my living room and watch television.

Occassionaly I'd find girls on the road who were so exhausted they wanted a lift.

I assumed they were hitting on me, or at least were superficial enough to like me because I was driving a Corvette, but every time they'd hop out of the car and hand me a coupon to buy new clothes.

I guess I'm not stylish enough.

My next thought was maybe my car wasn't cool enough, so I bought a vintage Jaguar coupe. This didn't help either.

I decided to buy a new house, maybe it would make me feel better. This time on the beach. Besides, I was running out of garage space.

It didn't help, but at least I had enough space for a new Lambourghini.

Maybe I'm just not picking up the right girls.